Another Grocery Store Tale
Gaw. It feels like all that I ever do on my days off from work is laundry and trips to the grocery store. Yesterday was no different.
Following a nearly-two hour midday nap, Ryan finished his lunch and seemed in a perfect mood for me to drag him to the grocery store. So I jumped at the chance to get him in and out of there before his compliant mood shifted.
The first 15 minutes of so of shopping went surprisingly well. Even though Ryan had refused to wear shoes to the store (see much earlier post regarding Grocery Store Feet), he seemed happy enough riding in the cart and helping me pick out produce.
When he saw the heaping piles of apples, he squealed and cried out, “Appahs!” When he spotted bunches of bananas, he proclaimed, “Nanahs!” He even helped me pick out a good tomato and some zucchini. He was my little farmer-in-training.
But then things changed. I made the mistake of going down the cookie and cracker aisle and letting him see me select a bag of animal crackers.
He went berserk! He started screeching in a pitch that I could swear was just below the one that only dogs can hear. He grabbed at the bag and demanded that I open it IMMEDIATELY!
So like the frenzied, panicked mother we’ve all seen in the grocery store on at least one sad occassion, I ripped that bag open with my teeth and started feeding my banshee animal crackers.
Just offering him animal crackers wasn’t enough. He wanted a show with his meal. So I had the exciting task of making various animal noises for his entertainment.
I’d pull out a lion-shaped cracker and have to give a loud, “ROOOOAAAAR!” before he’d take it.
I’d fish out a monkey-shaped cracker and go, “OOOH-OOOH, AAAH-AAAH!”
Ryan would laugh hysterically, take the cracker from me, and shove it into his mouth. Then he’d point at the bag and want more. This little scenario played out at least 47 times as I tried to quickly finish my shopping. Meanwhile, strangers gawked at the animal-sounds performance I was giving, much to the delight of my crazily giggling 16 month old.
When I finally went up to the register to pay for my cart full of items, I sheepishly tried to explain to the cashier why I was holding a half-eaten bag of animal crackers that I had yet to pay for. She stopped me midway through my explanation and said, “Oh, honey, we’ve ALL been there. Here, let me scan that bag first and then you can give it back to him.”
I was beyond relieved! Here I was thinking what a terrible mother I must be to ply my child with animal cookies to prevent an in-store meltdown. But then I realized, Nah. I’m just a veteran mom now. I’ve been there. And I lived to tell about it.
March 21st, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Hee heee heeee